It's funny how things work sometimes. At times I was struggling to write a single post a month, here I am two in the morning finishing a piece that I wanted to write. What changed? I allowed myself to remove the obstacle that was causing me to write once a month. It was, sharing the things I wrote for me. Plus a few other things but I'll talk about it in a bit. Turns out that, I put away writing because I was embarrassed to share what I was writing. Rightfully so because it wasn't very good, but that's not the point. It's mostly the ego, that wants to be perfect, to protect itself. All it ends up doing is, get in the way of your progress. I tried fighting against it, and I would write twice a month on some months. So I decided to fuck it and not share anything. What happened next was quite surprising, I wrote every day since I made that decision. In the last four weeks, I wrote more posts than I wrote ever before. Are they better? Not sure. But I've let that expectation go. Instead the goal is to do more of what I like, to write.
Isn't the goal to write good shit?
Sure, I don't think anyone who likes to write, gets into it to write bad shit. Sometime, it can get in the way. Initially, no matter how well you try to write, it will suck. It's the process. Unless you are insanely gifted, it will be so for you too. The goal should instead have been to write everyday. It's a simpler goal, and overtime I might even get good at it. Right now, I'm not there yet, but I'm writing everyday. So I know I will get there eventually.
Why write?
I've always liked the process. I've always had a notebook, that I write random scribbles in since I was fifteen, I still do. A lot of the notebooks are lost, but I never wrote them to go reminisce. Words on paper or on a screen here help me process my thoughts. They are mostly not accurate or complete yet, but I find that the more I write, they become clearer. Plus I just enjoy it.
A small trick to do the things you want more
In my case, it turned out that perfection was my enemy. More precisely, perfection when I was starting something. It would get so bad that, I was never able to do meaningful work that could compound over the course of time. So I allowed myself to do the simplest thing possible. Let go of all notion of results. To my surprise, I started to do the things I wanted more and often. As an example, my goal is to write one line in my posts. But before you know it, you are four paragraphs in, and just like that you have a half cocked post. It's not going to change anyone's life, but it's changing mine. One day at a time.
Final thoughts
Understanding yourself a little bit, can help you build systems that reduce the friction in the things you want to do. That is the goal for me. To not do the best I can, but the least I can, and do it daily.
Good night :)