When I decided to write everyday (almost) about seven months ago, my very first excuse was, what am I even going to write about, every fucking day? This always means I don't have a title, really. If you think about it that's all there is. The…
I just gave myself the best lesson of my life. I put my ugliest and darkest truths out in the sun. On their own. No explanations, no reasons or justifications. I tasted freedom on a level that I never have before. I did not and still don't care…
As part of getting better at Zig, I've been working on building a Compiler for about a month or so now. My understanding of Zig has just sky rocketed in the last month or so. It's easy when you know nothing. To the point that I…
The ache is back, the pain of staying the same is now far superior to the pain of making the changes. It's fascinating how much you can learn about yourself, what you really want, if you dive into the cesspool of your undistracted mind. Does it also mean…
I've been working on getting out of my own way for a while now. It's a lot harder than I imagined and especially harder to face the facts of who I am, not as something written in stone but rather a place to start. As I…
This stream has been the shortest I've ever done since I started streaming, yet I cannot believe that I was capable of this. When building habits I have one rule, never miss twice. The harder the habit, like streaming at 0400, the more rigidly I have to follow…
When I start of something new or something uncomfortable, I've come to find that the reason I procrastinate is the discomfort of the unknown. I feel it in my bones, it feels like a waste of time and soon I feel like a waste of time. None of…
It fills me with pride to think how much I've grown. This would have been demoralizing and heart breaking to me in the past. It has been this time too. But not enough to break me. I have the wisdom of experience, to know where the road to…